My husband gave me a necklace

My husband gave me a necklace. It's fake. I requested fake. Maybe I'm paranoid, but in this day and age, I don't want something around my neck that's worth more than my head. ~Rita Rudner

Men who have a pierced ear...

I think men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage. They've experienced pain and bought jewelry. 

-Rita Rudner